"a utopia with attitude"

now available from Amazon and and Aqueduct Press


Earth has discovered it is not alone in the universe. The aliens – pink, shapeless, and peaceful – are very nice, but after a string of failed diplomatic missions, they ask Earth to stop with the crazies and send someone normal. In frustration, the UN devises a lottery to pick the next ambassador and washes its hands of the problem.

Enter Rose Delancy, a Jersey waitress with a grudge against pretty much the whole world, but especially her sister, Alice. Rose is not actually happy about winning, though Rose is not particularly happy about anything. When she arrives on Unpronounceable–the planet having a name she refuses to try to say–she is nothing but rude to the Blobs, as she calls them, and they find it refreshing. She likes them, they like her, and Rose has the job of ambassador for as long as she wants.

Rose settles in and starts teaching the natives all about humans with the help of Hollywood movies, junk food, and the occasional bout of PMS. They show her a few things of their own involving the transformation of matter, but Rose is only interested in how it applies to sex. That is until she learns that she’s been suckered to play the patsy for an interstellar takeover by Earth. To avoid the horrors of planetary annihilation, not to mention having to go back to Jersey and her family, Rose and the Blobs have to to stop the invasion, save the planet, and ultimately take on her sister.

Read Rose's blog or follow @AmbassadorRose